Speaker profile last updated by AAE Talent Team on 06/25/2024.
Radical emotional acceptance, or REA, is systematic desensitization therapy for our fear of emotions. I have honed this approach with my patients over the past decade, and it delivers swift results. Instead of treating emotions as the enemy, they become our friends. Rather than avoiding them, we feel them fully. We get curious. We start to explore. We become less reliant on our persistent thoughts and more trusting of our sixth sense, that mysterious, gut-level instinct that guides us toward the light.
We all have emotions of sadness or disappointment that come and go. It can be an obvious knee-jerk reaction to want to simply get rid of them and somehow just be happy all of the time. This can become a pathology in its own right when it is supported by a family history and a culture offering endless methods to avoid or fix or work through the sadness as if it is the disease. But what if emotions in the "sad category" simply have a special purpose to play to help us in our lives?
As men in my practice started to emote freely, their lives started to change. Mine, too. Many of their “emotional problems” would vanish when they started to apply the five steps and take their lives back. Relationships and jobs got better. Income increased. Self-esteem and physical health improved. Symptoms of depression and anxiety abated. In short, they were becoming whole again and at peace with their emotional reality.
REA set me free. I was constantly at war with myself, believing all kinds of B.S. stories in my head about my emotions—all the stuff I was indoctrinated with growing up. That I should just “be a man and take it!” That I shouldn’t feel sad. That I should just let it go. That I shouldn’t be angry. That I should be happy. That I shouldn’t be so scared. That I shouldn’t allow hate in my heart. That I shouldn’t be jealous. I was “shoulding” all over myself.
Emotions are the pure, visceral sensations that happen to us. Emotions, like colors, need no explanation; they just are. Think of an emoji chart: Happy. Sad. Disgust. Confusion. Joy. Hate. Feelings are emotions plus a story, and the story we tell ourselves is often not true or helpful. Emotions are also separate from behaviors. It is possible to experience intense, true, and pure anger without becoming violent or throwing a tantrum.
A flash of microexpression on your partner’s face may send you a world of “emotional data” as your emotional antenna suddenly picks up a combination of fear, curiosity, annoyance, mistrust, anticipation, compassion, sadness, and a smattering of hope. This pure data, much like the data provided by our other senses, is instantly filtered and processed through our bodies and mind–our emotional memories of our past, our partner’s past, our current relationship status, and sense of attachment. We may sense tightness in our chest, chills down our spine, butterflies in our stomach, or a sudden sensation of nausea.
Perhaps you've acted flaky by canceling plans too often. Or maybe you're jealous of your bestie's success, or you feel annoyed because your friend is so obsessed and distracted by their phone that you can hardly stand to be around them. We've all been there, and luckily, there is a constructive way to strengthen these friendships that are teetering on the edge of breakup.
Deep down, you want to keep the friendship, but your negative emotions get in the way.
Radical emotional acceptance (REA) offers tools to help strengthen friendships. With REA, we can gather emotional data, learn from emotional wisdom, and act in an emotionally informed way so that our friendships remain strong. Here's how to do it.
Dr. Alex Wills is a keynote speaker and industry expert who speaks on a wide range of topics such as , How to Tap Into Extra Energy Using Radical Emotional Acceptance, The Power of [Now] Emotions, How Men Can Embrace Their Emotions, Negative Emotions Are Best Friends and How to Be a Better Friend: Tap Into Emotional Data. The estimated speaking fee range to book Dr. Alex Wills for your event is $5,000 - $10,000. Dr. Alex Wills generally travels from Boise, ID, USA and can be booked for (private) corporate events, personal appearances, keynote speeches, or other performances. Similar motivational celebrity speakers are Johnny Crowder, Jenny Wang, Dr. Chris Sopa, Catherine Sanderson and Dr. Lawana Gladney. Contact All American Speakers for ratings, reviews, videos and information on scheduling Dr. Alex Wills for an upcoming live or virtual event.
This website is a resource for event professionals and strives to provide the most comprehensive catalog of thought leaders and industry experts to consider for speaking engagements. A listing or profile on this website does not imply an agency affiliation or endorsement by the talent.
All American Entertainment (AAE) exclusively represents the interests of talent buyers, and does not claim to be the agency or management for any speaker or artist on this site. AAE is a talent booking agency for paid events only. We do not handle requests for donation of time or media requests for interviews, and cannot provide celebrity contact information.
If you are the talent and wish to request a profile update or removal from our online directory, please submit a profile request form.